It's actually a strange thing, trusting God. For one thing, it's never all that easy. We're constantly struggling to hand over our worries, hopes and dreams. Often, because we're afraid that He won't do with them what we want done with them.
Then, when we do finally realize that His will is so much better for us than our own, we start praying. And often, we start praying for something while keeping in mind how that thing will come about.
Sometimes, things do happen the way we've envisaged.
Other times... not so much. And I think that we often miss the fact that we've been blessed because we weren't blessed in the way we expected.
This recently hit me. See, I've been wanting to self publish my books ever since I got the rights tot them back. Which means I've been wanting to self publish for over a year. The thing is, it's expensive and really hard to do in a way that's not expensive while still looking professional.
On my other blog, I often talk about how self publishing makes more and more economic sense these days. However, I also know that self publishing is, at least for now, what God wants me to do. I can go into long explanations as to how I know, but let's just say that a lot of prayer has been going into this and it's the answer I kept getting all year.
As you might know, last year pretty much wiped the floor with my behind, and there simply wasn't money available for things like buying a cover or anything else related to publishing for myself.
So I've been praying and praying and nothing really happens.
Or so I thought. Because although my financial position is improving thanks to my business picking up, there's so much that needs to be done with the money that I just can't comfortably spend it on luxuries.
Then, at the beginning of this month, I got a surprise royalty payment from my former publishing house. One that I can easily call a windfall that I could spend on anything. Which automatically made me think of what I'd need to pay for to publish.
Except... Once I thought about it, I realized that God had given me everything I needed for free. I've been blessed with amazing critique partners and an ability to edit without an editor. I then got a book with step by step instructions for formatting and cover design as a gift in return for a critique. And while following those instructions, I got the perfect images for the covers - that are in the creative commons.
So even though I still didn't get a cent toward publishing my books, I'll still have a highly professional product without needing to actually pay for it.
And if it wasn't for a $22 royalty check that's still waiting to be used, I would never have noticed.
What about you? Have you ever almost missed the opportunity God gave you because it didn't look like your expectations?