You can't imagine how much I don't want to write this post. See... This blog is about taking charge.... of succeeding. And the point is I'm not.
My weight seems to be something I'll have to grapple with for the rest of my life. There will be no quick fix. There will be no lasting success.
And you know why? Because I have an addiction. To sugars and refined carbs. Every time I make the same mistake of thinking I can handle it when I start eating them.
Short term, I can handle things fine, but once I start, sugars keep creeping into my diet and before I know it, I have a serious problem.
Right now, you might be chuckling, but I'm dead serious. The medical community is starting to come around to the fact that sugar and refined carbs can be as addictive as smoking and alcohol. Moreover, they're becoming more aware that such an addiction is about as dangerous to our health.
We used to need rapid releases of energy back when we were running from dangerous creatures, or hunting the ones we needed to eat. In those times, refined sugars would have been perfect, and that's why our bodies react to it the way they do. Most of us crave it. All. The. Time.
Problem is that we no longer run to or from creatures. We simply don't need rapid releases from sugar anymore. On the contrary, we need slow-release carbs in our diet as that gives us better stamina to get through the day. But see... our lives are more complicated. One can argue that it's much more stressful, which means we're living under conditions somewhat similar to having to face down a sabre toothed tiger.
So our body's response is to want sugar, because sugar gives you energy to run. To run fast. To run far. And to run RIGHT NOW.
Except... we don't. We stay seated at our desks, we power through all the stress and the resulting high-crash cycle from the sugar we consume adds to our stress. Which means...
You guessed it. More sugar.
Add to that the fact that consumption of sugar desensitizes our bodies to its effect (yup, like an alcoholic needing to drink more to get drunk)...
Yes. More sugar. And more. And more. And more.
So yes. As you can see, I get it. I know that it's dangerous. And what's even more dangerous for me is that after losing 14lb after cutting back on my consumption, I regained 18lb since that post, simply because my body isn't wanting to let go of the habit. That's a huge amount to gain in less than a month.
I can't go on like this. My body can't handle the stress of the weight I lose and gain. So this is where I go cold turkey. This is also where a ton of you will be going on about it being unhealthy to cut out carbs. But the fact is this.
There is no cutting back for me.
Cutting back only results in my weight yo-yoing.
Which is worse for my body and my health than probably anything else I can do short of eating poison.
I have diabetes and hyper-insulinism in my direct family, and already have other hormone issues, so I really DON'T need more problems.
And no, the cut-out won't be permanent. As soon as I see I really do need carbs again - which might be a while, given the amount of fat my body can use instead - I will re-introduce them to my diet the healthy way. In other words, next to nothing refined.
But first, I need to kick this habit, and this time I hope that it'll be permanent. An in order to keep myself on track, I'll be posting daily updates, at least at the end of every post I do. I will try to post more than weight loss, in case you're wondering, but right now, this is the biggest priority when it comes to me controlling my life.
Weight Today: 105.7 KG (233 lb, 0.5 oz)