As I mentioned yesterday, 2014 was one of those years I'll happily never want to repeat again. It's now April, and my family and I are still dealing with ramifications of what had happened. So, in an effort to come to terms with everything, I'm writing about things I've learned in this period. This way, I at least have something positive to take away from all my experiences.
Just so you know, this post will have a Christian theme to it, so if you'd rather read something religion free, I have a blog about writing here.
Let me tell you a simple truth. Watching your whole life sink down a drain without you being able to do anything about it is enough to drive one mad.
Again, I'm left struggling for words. I don't think I can make someone understand what the few months between December and March of this year was like. And that says a lot. I'm a writer. I should be able to make people understand anything.
The year 2014 was the worst year of my life so far, and December to March was when the full impact of everything that had happened hit at the same time. If you've read my pre-2014 posts on this blog, you'll know I'm a go-getter. So the worst of this period is this sense I had. That a damn wall had burst somewhere and flooded my life with so much negativity that I had no power to do anything but to let myself be washed along by the torrent.
This feeling, to say the least, is terrifying.
The powerlessness about it is worse.
Especially when you see your loved ones in the middle of the disaster right there with you.
A few blessings were all that stood between me and despair:
God staying with me and being with me. Even when I screamed at Him in anger and pain.
Knowing (probably because of God's help) that no matter what had happened, none of it was a physical. Neither me, nor any members of my family, nor our employees or even our pets were seriously ill or passed away during this bleak period between December and March. My losses, although having an impact on my belief in humanity, never truly impacted my person or those of my loved ones.
Knowing (definitely with God's help) that Romans 8:28 is true:
And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. (More on this on U-Day)
As long as long as I kept those blessings in front of me, the events swirling around me weren't insurmountable. Because no matter how big those things are, my God is bigger, and I have Him on my side.
Have you counted your blessings lately?
13 comments:
I’m not religious. Unfortunately, I may add. I’ve always admired religious people; even though I don’t believe in God, I’m happy that you can see your life in a bigger context. I imagine that religion can give some frame, something to relate to, and ideally support and hope.
That being said, I’ve been very grateful as well. I’m blessed with very good friends and a fantastic family. I’m also very grateful for the society I’m living in. I was really down in 2014. From a tax payer’s perspective, I was worthless. But even though nobody knew if I ever recovered, I got great medical treatment and had access to other resources. I really felt that both my private circles AND society was there when I needed them the most.
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Had my share of trials, hard times but through it all you have to remember the blessings!
Always count the blessings. I try to, everyday, even on the bad days, because it could always be worse.
This is the second A to Z post I've seen on Blessings. It's a great topic.
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Matthew MacNish from The QQQE
A great topic, sometimes hard to discuss. I have spells where I'm not very good at counting my blessings, I have many and I think I take them for granted too often. I need to remember to be thankful, I am ...but I don't say so often enough to him.
Sandy at Bridge and Beyond
Amen with your line "My God is bigger and he's on my side" because that is so true. There is always a blessing even in the hardest of times. Sometimes we can't see it then, we might not see it for years, but there is always a blessing.
betty
Great topic. Every morning we pray something we are thankful for. This is one of the best things we can teach our kids.
I try to count my blessings and remember to be thankful often. Something that really started helping me through depression was actually thanking God each day I woke up. I actually heard that Oprah does this and it made sense to me! There was a time I wanted to end my life. I am so grateful that I'm still here. Thanking God for another day is a simple way to remember you are blessed.
Thank you for the reminder! :)
Wow, this is such an inspirational piece! I just come home from church and read this and I think, wow, God is truly supporting us even in the hardest of times. The fact that a few blessings came your way this year is a sign that His works will truly come together for the good of us.
I'm so, so sorry that 2014 was such an awful year for you, and that it's taken a while to recover. How wonderful, though, that you're ready to look at your blessings and focus on them. May 2015 be far better for you than 2014 ever was.
2014 was a year I was glad to see go too. Sometimes it's very hard to remember the blessings we do have when things are tough. I'm glad you had your faith to help you get through such tough times and I'm sorry you are still dealing with the after-effects of what happened. I hope you and your family can completely put all of it behind you soon.
Amen! Well said. And thank you for posting the whole verse, not just the 1st half. So many want to quote only the first half and ignore the rest. Then they wonder why God isn't coming to their aid.
I too went through a tough period when I screamed to God, cried to God, argued with God. But thank God his love is so real and He is so big that He could handle whatever I threw at Him.
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I'm really glad that you've found blessings in your life even if you've gone through a rough year.
I agree, Mike.
Tanya, that's very true.
Thanks, Matthew.
Sandy, I think we all have days where we lose perspective. A few months ago, my natural inclination was to think over all I'd lost rather than all the things I still had.
I agree, Betty. Just because we can't see the blessing doesn't mean it isn't there.
Stephen that is a wonderful way to approach life.
Mindi that's a wonderful way to get through the darkness of depression. All the best with your further journey.
Couldn't agree with you more, Astrid. :-)
Thanks so much, Caryn.
Thanks Julie. I hope 2015 is going better for you too.
Barbara, I know exactly what you mean. It's something that has frustrated me to no end that even in churches, it seems that people PURPOSEFULLY omit the context of a verse in order to bash it into saying what people want it to say. I try not to do that. (Just hope I succeed at it.)
Also, it's wonderful to know that God understands even when we don't. :-)
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