A to Z of Lessons Learned in 2014: Solidarity

Just a quick recap for everyone who's new to this series: Because 2014 sucked as a year, I'm making it a mission to write about the A to Z of things I learned from the hard time. It's my way of finding something positive in a difficult time. 

When I picked out words to go with each letter, I knew that Solidarity had to be S. Because in the past eighteen months, I've learned just how blessed I am to have a family and friends who jump right in to fight the good fight with me. 

Times like these are when we see who's really with us, and I'm grateful to say that there were more of these angels in human form than my family and I had expected. Which isn't to say anything bad about the people in our lives. 

It's just that after the events in 2014, we've lost a lot of faith in people. And then there was 2015, with more people seemingly out to prove that humanity just sucks. 

And yet, our friends and family really stepped up even when we'd given up on hoping that anyone was on our side. These people proved to us that good is still out there. That we can't give up because they haven't given up on us. 

They also taught me how much I want to be this friend to other people. Who's there when those people need me most. 

So this is just a thank you. Even if they won't read this post. 

I've thanked them personally too, of course. But the funny thing is that most of them didn't even want to be thanked. 

They inspire me to be better. 

They inspire me to be there. 

Have you also seen solidarity at work in a hard time? Any people surprise you by coming through when you least expected it? 

Change

Credit

I'm at a strange point in my life. It's about a year after I finished university, it feels like I'm really hitting the transition phase. You know the one?

All my friends as getting married or are having babies. Most of us are drifting away from each other. And it's sad. For the past five or so years, I relied on them, laughed with them, cried with them. We were there for each other...

But every day I realize more and more that, although we'll stay friends and I'll have great memories to cherish, the season on most of my friendships is now autumn. Maybe some of them will make it back to spring soon, but I think most of them won't.

It's just that... well... we're spread over the world, doing our own things. Living our lives. Without each other. Making friends to fill the gaps left by our friends of old.

I guess that's why I'm feeling this change so keenly. For the most part of last year, a large part of my life went on hold to build the business I now work for. My social life suffered for it and I didn't meet new people my age. Now it's different. I can afford a life again. And with it came an opportunity to start making new friends. But in the mean time, there's this gap that I'm still having to fill.

It'll happen. But in the mean time, I'm having to spend more time either working on growing new friendships or alone. There's no time where I can be just in between with someone. And it makes me quite lonely.

Still... there are many opportunities as I get more involved with my church and my community.

But that's not the only thing that's changing in my life. My professional life is going from strength to strength, but my music is suffering a little because of a lack of time. But at the same time, my work gave me a frame around which I could stretch my time to finish edits. And yes. They're done. I have a finished manuscript. So all in all, not bad. But this is the time when I have to let my manuscript loose on the world. It's when I have to focus my work more in an attempt to be even more successful. It's when I have to look at my art. At what I want to write next.

All this is so At the same time, it's a little scary, because transition means something else. I get to shift priorities again. Do I change my goals? Set new ones? Do I decide to spend more time on friends or less on art? Or do I find friends (somehow) who understand my passions?

This is also the moment when I take stock. What's worth it? What's not? Because before I do that, I can't decide where to go in the future. Granted, I'm pretty sure I'm happy with the way things are going so I might not change much at all...

Anyone else reaching a transition in your life?

Friendships

My cousin came to visit this past weekend and it just got me thinking about friendships in my life. If that seems like an interesting leap to make, I should explain that my cousin is also my oldest friends. We grew up together. Often in the same house.

Which is probably what got me thinking. I only see her once every year or so nowadays, because we live very far apart, but I still feel closer to her than any of my other friends. In fact, she's more like my little sister than my cousin.

Anyway. I got around to thinking... I've got a lot of people who I'm really friendly with. Friendly enough that people would think that we're friends. And I guess we are.

It's just that there are parts of me in the dark corners of my soul that I don't share with just anyone. Those parts of me, I share with only my closest friends.

Of those, I probably have about four. Maybe five.

But that's okay. Because I'm absolutely devoted to them.

So what about you? Do you make many friends? Or do you also only have a selected few?